It's Christmas, so we're gonna party like it's 1984, by hanging around in a cardboard windmill while a witch tries to capture a puppet.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
Additional musical contributions by R Gill
Clive Dunn had a number one hit single called Grandad in 1971, then made a TV show called Grandad without even using the song Grandad as the theme. And the show isn't even really about him being a Grandad.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
Additional musical contributions by R Gill
Kid 'n' Play were also known as the Fresh Force Crew. That sounds like a better name for a cartoon. Or a line of action figures. Or cleaning products.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
Additional musical contributions by R Gill
Rod Hull made loads of live action tv shows about living with an emu and being chased around by a witch, and when he was given the chance to write and star in a cartoon, he also made that about living with an emu and being chased around by a witch. Say what you like, that man knew his target audience.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
Additional musical contributions by R Gill
Bob Monkhouse hosts a classic boring gameshow based on Bingo, without the massive marker pens and angry pensioners. Although it was the eighties, so there's no way to know how old these contestants are.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
Additional musical contributions by R Gill
Most people in the UK have heard of Viz, the naughty sweary comic for adults. In the early 90s, there were a lot of cheap knockoffs, and Zit the comic produced an even cheaper VHS full of badly animated versions of their comic strips.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
Additional musical contributions by R Gill
The bloke who made Camberwick Green, Trumpton and Chigley clearly wasn't satisfied with a legacy of beloved and timeless animations, so he made sure to create something horrifying and awful before the end of his career.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
Additional musical contributions by R Gill
Spike Milligan ad libs the narration for a cartoon about rats that his daughter came up with. I bet if we'd listened to this instead of talking all over it we might have actually enjoyed this.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
Additional musical contributions by R Gill
Time for another cartoon we assumed we'd already talked about, as we watch Roobarb and discover that one of us has always been fundamentally incorrect about this scribbly cartoon dog.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
Additional musical contributions by R Gill
Want to jazz up some bible stories a bit? Just give everything two heads, and make everything that isn't usually alive, alive. And keep them under 5 minutes, that'll help as well.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
Additional musical contributions by R Gill
There were several elephant-based kids' shows in the 80s and 90s. This is one of them.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
Additional musical contributions by R Gill
We finish our trilogy of cartoons based on films that weren't made for children, by watching Police Academy the Animated Series, because nothing sells action figures like jokes about sexual harrassment and homophobia.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
Additional musical contributions by R Gill
We continue our trilogy of cartoons based on films that weren't made for children, by watching Robocop the Animated Series, because nothing sells action figures like the reanimated corpse of a mutilated police officer.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
Additional musical contributions by R Gill
We start a trilogy of cartoons based on films that weren't made for children, by watching Rambo: The Force of Freedom, because nothing sells action figures like post-traumatic stress disorder.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
Additional musical contributions by R Gill
We watch some more old ads to reminisce about how spoiled we were when we were kids, and look at loads of toys we probably ended up owning because we cried about them.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
Additional musical contributions by R Gill
We watch some old ads to reminisce about chocolate we used to eat and wish we were still eating. Why aren't we eating chocolate right now? To be honest, one of us probably is...
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
Additional musical contributions by R Gill
Elephants wear clothes and glasses and talk and everyone's just cool with that for some reason apparently. Still, they have a functioning monarchy so best not to ask too many questions or Babar will probably have you beheaded.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
Additional musical contributions by R Gill
That's right, we threatened we'd do it, so now sit back and watch everyone's favourite mish-mash of Japanese Super Sentai shows and American teenagers with "attitude." An attitude that's generally pleasant and well-meaning. Edgy.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
Additional musical contributions by R Gill
Is there a better way to welcome a new year than by watching a drunken butler trip over a tiger rug? If there is I don't want to hear about it. Because I watched this and I'm already depressed enough.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
Additional musical contributions by R Gill
Allsorts is an awful cut-price Rainbow wannabe, except instead of puppets there are simple men, and instead of a bear there's a human-dog hybrid straight out of your nightmares.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
Additional musical contributions by R Gill
Dodo likes to rhyme whilst speaking, if irritation's what you're seeking.
His alien race resembles pixies, like the ones on your Rice Krispies.
He also has a robot chicken, whose face and beak I'd like to kick in.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
Additional musical contributions by R Gill
The Animal Kwackers look like a group of bank robbers who went to a fancy dress shop that was going out of business. Or a Banana Splits tribute act who hated the Banana Splits. Or the physical embodiment of some lost lyrics from "I am the Walrus."
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
Additional musical contributions by R Gill
If you Google Sir Prancealot you'll probably get a load of boring statistics about a racehorse, but that's still more entertaining than this cartoon.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
Additional musical contributions by R Gill
Round 3... FIGHT! We finish our fighting game trilogy with the Mortal Kombat animated series, presumably made for all the kids who weren't allowed to play the gory games, but did anyway.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
Additional musical contributions by R Gill
We continue our fighting game trilogy with the animated spin-off of a side-scrolling arcade beat-em-up. But why does this cartoon feel like it takes twice as long to watch? Because it's Double Drag-on!
This is the best I could come up with, leave me alone.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
Additional musical contributions by R Gill