Robotix was a cartoon designed to sell robot toys, and it succeeds... in making us want to buy toys from other robot cartoon toy adverts.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme piano arrangement by Richard L Gill
Haunted puppets of woodland creatures lurk in the darkness throughout Fox Tales, which may or may not be a manifestation of our nightmarish collective consciousness.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
A big green space rabbit and a four-armed duck kidnap a human child to kill toads, and we all went along with it because the theme song was good. Shame on all of us.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
We discover what it probably feels like to go mad as we watch a load of vehicle/animal hybrid abominations living in a weird post-apocalyptic landscape. This should have been called "Car-Pets" and I'm annoyed I only just thought of that.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
We learn all about Umbrella Trees using the internet and our own curiosity, with no thanks to this boring bunch of puppet bastards who nobody's ever heard of.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
A pile of rubbish pretending to be a dog has adventures and there's rubbish everywhere and we're supposed to be ok with all the rubbish everywhere but it's awful and I hate it. What-A-Fucking-Mess indeed.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
The Karate Kid has had two TV spin-offs - one is about searching the globe for a magic shrine or something, and the other is just about middle-aged men remembering the 80s. Why would anyone watch or listen to the second one?
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
A polar bear and a girl try on some coats and nobody asks any questions. It would be perfectly reasonable to ask why she has a polar bear with her. Or even why the polar bear is trying on coats. But nobody does.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
Time for a proper forgotten nightmare fuel treat this week as we watch Rocky Hollow, which definitely didn't exist but is also definitely going to crawl out of whatever screen you're watching it on and kill you.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
A cushion puppet competes with a man in tight trousers for the most inappropriate bulge on a kids' TV show, as we watch Hickory House before washing our eyes out with bleach.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
Arguably the best video game series ever made has only ever received the worst cartoon spin-offs. Super Mario World is apparently a blast from the past. But what's your favourite kind of blast? Let us know.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
How do you make a cartoon out of woodland creatures living in doll houses? Add some unnecessary human kids, several layers of reality, a vampire villain and a rejected Wuzzle.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme piano arrangement by Richard L Gill
Three more music videos get talked over this week, but luckily Martyn's picks are mostly boring so you're not missing anything.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme piano arrangement by Richard L Gill
We decide to look at some more 80s music videos, and start off with three of Mark's picks. So roll up your jacket sleeves, grab a pair of legwarmers and get ready to dance to the sound of two men talking over all the music. Boooo!
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme piano arrangement by Richard L Gill
"Ranger... Barbarian... Magician... Thief... Cavalier... and Acrobat!"
100 more episodes have gone by, so Mark and Martyn re-re-revisit the first episode of W4B by re-re-rewatching the first episode of Dungeons and Dragons. Again. Because they said
they would. And they are stupid.
Re-re-reliving all the fun and adventure of a group of abandoned teenagers hampered in their quest to get home by a small mewling unicorn. For a fourth time. It's just as good as it sounded every other time before.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
Mike Read has made many things he should be ashamed of. A racist UKIP Calypso song, a board game based on a rubbish TV quiz, and a TV quiz which would subsequently be made into a rubbish board game. We examine two of those things this week. Happy 300 episodes!
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
Shake some blue cloth around - now you're in the water! Wear a cushion on your head - now you're a pirate! Record 299 episodes of a podcast - now you're famous and popular!
Pretending is fun.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
Thanks to Indiana Jones, this is only the second most boring thing with a crystal skull in it.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
A load of fruit and vegetables are alive and have named themselves the Munch Bunch, which is like a load of prisoners on death row calling themselves the Hang Gang.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
What's the best way to cap off one of the most depressing anxiety-inducing years ever? Watching a load of downtrodden animated first-graders suffering with emotional issues of course!
Happy New Year Charlie Brown, you morose little prick.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
Copy this thing you saw a professional do once. Copy it with your Mum or Dad. Oh no, you've done it wrong. Now you look stupid don't you. Now say "CUDDLY TOY!"
Everyone join in, say cuddly toy.
We're not going anywhere until you say it.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
When Happy Days ended, what happened to the Fonz? Did he;
Die in a tragic repeat of his shark-jumping demonstration?
Continue to live above a garage to be sexually available for his best friend's mother?
Time travel with a dog, a magic future woman and two losers?
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme piano arrangement by Richard L Gill
Before Jurassic Park, the best animated dinosaurs ever committed to film were in Moschops. I haven't really kept track since then, but Moschops is probably still up there, right?
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme piano arrangement by Richard L Gill
Jon Pertwee narrates the adventures of a boy, an alien and an alien's imaginary friend, as we debate whether real things or imaginary things are scarier.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme acoustic arrangement by Joe Beckhelling
Despite sounding like a badly constructed innuendo pseudonym, Ivor Wood was also a real person, who used second-hand Postman Pat puppets to tell stories about an old lady in the mostly forgotten animated series, Gran.
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W4B theme composed by John Croudy
W4B theme piano arrangement by Richard L Gill